Well, another year is coming to a close. 2014 is is on its way out the door and 2015 is barreling in with a keg of beer.
2014, artistically, has been a super slow and dry year for me. Probably my laziest of years. Work and depression have hit me hard year. To be fair, depression has always hit hard for me, but I've only just now experienced that mixed with a dose of a job I loathe. Eh, whatever pays the bills. I haven't stopped drawing all together, I've honestly been doodling and plotting on the side. So I've got stuff in store, and I appreciate all of you who have stuck by me with your support and friendship...and I apologize for being such a ghost.
But I'm going to focus on the good stuff that happened this year (at least for me):
1. Got promoted. It's not much, but it's much more tolerable than my previous position. To be fair, I get yelled and screamed at for a living basically...I guess I could say I'm a professional masochist. Still, it's not the worst, and at least I have a paycheck coing in, as well as a network of co-workers that make me feel at home. It helps pay for art supplies, as well as food. I like food, ya know?
2. Getting a little better with my anxiety. Don't get me wrong, I still have it. I doubntt it's something that I'll ever totally get rid of. But having more and more control over something that drains me of my time, energy and confidence....feels a little liberating.
3. My sister got married. It didn't happen directly to me, but I was there. So it counts. I'm very glad to see my big sis so happy with a man who I think is positively groovy...and more importantly, so does she! Many happy years to my sister and new brother-in-law! :cheers:
4. I got engaged to the most amazing person. We have our ups and downs...to be fair, mostly up, but I feel proud to call myself his fiance. We don't plan on getting married for at least 2 years (I'm really slow when it comes to big things like this, so sue me). Save up, plan, and just grow even closer. And with this last addition to the list, this makes it a little easier to do said planning and saving...
5. Got a place of my own! Finally, something to end the crisis that had actually had me finding quite a bit of comfort at the bottom of a bottle and stressing me to the point of having ulcers. Again. Don't laugh, the housing situation in Illinois is terrible. It's going to be a slow and tedious process, but I'm excited. My om and I are getting my grandparents' house and splitting it. She gets top half, I get bottom. So, we're renovating it to be an actual livable apartment! Is it my dream home? No. But it's taken such a load off my mind that I can actually breathe and don't completely loathe the next day. It saves money/gas/time having to arrange between seeing the fiance, going to work, doing other things....It's also nice to be reminded that I won't be homeless!
It does feel a little strange, I admit, starting my new life in the house I spent most of my childhood life in. I've spent many years living with the grandparents and there's a lot of memories in these walls. But, I guess like the new year, it's all about remembering those things but making way for new ones. I'll still have all those fond memories...I'll just be making new memories. Like the death and rebirth of the mighty Pheonix, or the sexual reassignment surgery of a transexual, this is not an end but only a glorious beginning!
And with a place, I won't feel cramped to one little room....and I'll be able to do that thing again. You know, the thing I do here and there? Starts with a 'd'?
That's right. Dance. I can dance once again. Thank gods, I was getting pent up from my lack of riverdance.
But nah, I can draw. I feel uneasy drawing with people around staring, so with a place, I can actually come home and do such a thing.
Thanks again for all your support and love and mushy mushy feelings. It was a great support. This upcoming year I hope to repay your kindness and faith.
Goodbye, 2014, you've been a great beginning. Bring on 2015, this is gonna be a good year!